Goodbye
June 2005 . Its been,... HmmmmmMMmm? Oh I know, Juneyish...
Wed June
29 2005 |
About
last night....
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Tuesday June
28 2005 |
Thank
U Craigs List....
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Monday June
27 2005 |
This
past weekend
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Saturday June
25 2005 |
What
a nice day....
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Friday June
23 2005 |
Bonus,
Dreams and Wonder
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Last night-Forever rebounded.
You live one way for a long, long time and the way
you were living for long time became sour, sad,
corrupted so then you lose it. How you lose it
weather it was your fault or the other parties
fault is circumstantial none the less you feel
real hurt, lost, and sacred and want to take away
the pain so you invent a pain killer. You embark
on a water down version of the way you were just
before you became sour, sad, corrupted and full
of pain. Only now you discover that this new watered
down-make-believe version of what once was is missing
something important you know you cant get back.
So you dry everything up along with all involved
with this new damp version of what you had before
and you try again and again and again until you
find yourself making others feel the same way you
did before you started taking your painkillers.
Its time to stop and face the fact that-that life
is gone. |
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9:00am Got
a big fat surprise in the mail today!!!
Yeah baby!!! We are large and incharge!!!
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3:30pm I
just got invited to a Japanese Gay Disco party
this Sunday. |
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My
Dreaming: So
I had this dream last night I couldn’t
make out. I walked into a pet store that was
filled to the
top with water, that’s right I was under
water when I walk in, I was breathing though. Every
thing was floating, all the animals and cages and
things you would find in a pet store. Bill and
Jay were there in the under water pet store to
prevent me from doing something, I don’t
know what that something was though, but they were
there stop me, or help me or rescue me. I walked
around the pet store and stared at all the floating
animals, a little puppy dog floating next to me
bark at me like a dog would sound like barking
underwater. The water was so clear, it was as if
everything was just floating in the air in slow
motion. Jay was around but I couldn’t see
him and bill was standing next to me. I grabbed
the doggy and ran out the store, Bill started chasing
me but I couldn’t tell if he was trying to
stop me or help me, Jay stood in the store. I started
to bleed in my hands and the puppy started to turn
green. I remember falling down in a ditch made
of rocks and barb wire but I didn’t get cut
or hurt, the puppy dog was still alive but it wasn’t
moving. I also remember floating and wearing weird
clothing. Bill pulled me out of the Ditch and said
something to me but I couldn’t make it out,
it was like I was under water, but I heard the
Puppy dog bark? Why couldn’t I here bill
when we splashed out of the pet store. I’m
still trying to remember the other things but
I cant right now. |
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Its Jessica and Nell |
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Its Kimba
Grunland is a a good shooter. |
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Wonder.
Just say goodnight, to yourself may I remind
you
when you find you, you're all alone is when you've
got to be strong cause that's when they call
you, in the night he's got your picture in his
mind he's got your number on a paper at his disposal
anytime is it really true could you save yourself
for someone who, loves you for you so many times
we just give it away, to someone who someone
who you Played pool in a bar the back of a car
and for a moment you felt important but not in
your
heart my self esteem, it's been low, go ahead and count it's been lower than
low i know the feeling of it stealing life out from under me i want to learn,
how
you save yourself for someone who, loves you for you so many times we just
give it away to someone who, couldn't even remember your name could you save
yourself for someone who, loves you for you, loves me for me
give it away to someone who someone who will cherish your name cause I want
to learn, can you save yourself for someone who will love you for you so many
times we just give it away, someone who, couldn't even remember your name you
save yourself for someone who, loves
you for you, loves me for me give it away to someone who, someone who will
cherish your name
cherish your name |
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GET IN THE HOLE
Thursday June
23 2005 |
Hello
there...from the last two days
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Dave
Padilla is GoooOoOoooOOooD |
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The
Tuesday APA night games for both E-bar
teams had some moving results. It's good
to see fire and ice once in while.
Beasties
Boys "Shit, if it’s going to
be that kind of a party
I’m gonna stick my dick in the mashed potatoes" |
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A little about yesterday and other
days of recent |
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I
had such a shifty day on Wed-day-time. I
am so mixed up about some people sometimes. I just
want to move forward and not walk over anyone in the
process. Ill walk next to you, I’m fine with
that. Ya-know nobody is loosing so why get so petty
about it? I live in NYC and barely keep my head above
water. I’ll just let it sit and let it do what
it feels it needs to do. My instinct is telling me
that is the right thing to do. Anyway, I need to follow
my own advice. Let it sit and marinate I say to the
player with game, you need to get worse before you
better. This happens to everybody. Easier said than
dealing with, I know. I can’t make the ball when
I need to but if I let go and have faith in my ability?
So, these last few weeks have been a growing experience.
I feel it. Physically. I think of my love life and
the first person that comes into my head are the ones
I don’t need to love. You cant own love it owns
u. I think of her and the others and feel scared. I
turn to pool and try and get good. What ever that means.
Surfing is something a surfer does because he loves
not because he must for a point. Break, the habits
I must. Neo is cool under pressure. Zen is zoning in
and out for me. I think that is what I want? Fire and
ice. Not ice calm with no judgment while addressing
the issue with appropriate action. Like the ref. |
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Wednesday June
22 2005 |
Retraction
... oops....
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We
played Sunday it was fun...
Dear APA player
I don’t insult player’s games, (that
would be bad karma). But I am not a big fan when
one of my own players throws me off with miss information.
Don’t get me wrong. I know he's got game, but
it wasn’t him or his game I was talking about
as the false alarm. That dudes game is goOOooOOoooOOOoOODDDddDDDDD!!!!!
He's not a false alarm, if anything; his game is
4-alarm fire. What kind of a player would I be if
I said he aint got game? Not a very smart one. I'm
not in the habit of insulting people on my website,
it was an honest mistake in my writing; I'm not that
smart when it comes to writing. Especially when I
had to edit 178 pics that day. I am sorry if came
across as a dumbass. Sometimes my grammar is not
so good and I sometimes might write something that
will getconstrued as an insult from time to time.
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Tuesday June
21 2005 |
About
the last few days....
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This
morning |
I
woke up this morning to smell the rose
Julie gave me for my Birthday yesterday, it bloomed
lovely
... Then I stared at the tee shirt George
gave me for my birthday last night, I think I will
wear it |
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Last
Friday night.... |
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It
was yur-averge night at the Ebar |
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Last
Saturday starting at about 6:00pm ending at about 5:00am
Sunday |
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Last
Sunday.... |
We
played Sunday it was fun ...
Dear
APA player I
don’t insult player’s games, (that would
be bad karma). But I am not a big fan when one of my
own players throws me off with miss information. Don’t
get me wrong. I know he's got game, but it wasn’t
him or his game I was talking about as the false alarm.
That dudes game is goOOooOOoooOOOoOODDDddDDDDD!!!!! He's
not a false alarm, if anything; his game is 4-alarm fire.
What kind of a player would I be if I said he aint got
game? Not a very smart one. I'm not in the habit of insulting
people on my website, it was an honest mistake in my
writing; I'm not that smart when it comes to writing.
Especially when I had to edit 178 pics that day. I am
sorry if came across as a dumbass. Sometimes my grammar
is not so good and I sometimes might write something
that will get construed as an insult from time to time.
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Monday...
My Birthday... The Laundry The Sox and The Dryer.... a warm
land of magic and fabric softner.... |
11:00am
While I was doing the laundry my sock disappeared
in the dryer dimension again.... 3 pair of socks
means six soxs in the dryer only too discover later
when the drying is done you only get back 3-and-3-4th
sox-back. Meaning five soxs. Every dryer is a door
way to another place, a land of lost sox’s.
These sox’s are waging a war with the land
of the lost keys. Maybe one day I will throw myself
in the dryer on perm press mode and find my self
in this land of lost sox and finally retrieve all
the lost sox I have had taken away from me for this
cross dimensional campaign taking place.
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Friday June
17 2005 |
Dinner
at Joe Shang Howdy Doodee
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Jennie
once told me after a few shots of Saki
in small town in korea...
Don’t eat the food in China town
William ... Especially the purple stuff.
Those cool trendy
back ally way resturuant places are rondom with
the orders and erbs. Also, dont eat the
beef or the Beff... the Beff is code word
for
Purple
stuff...
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Push
aside that "Sunny D" and try
the purple stuff, see what happens later,
Ok,
if Julie tries it, so will I. |
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Serafina
just makes the dinner after her trip from the Dominican
Republic. She likes Domincan boys in little speedoes. |
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After
dinner and our adventures in Narnia me and Julie
was kinda hoping for some free Sangria Thursdays
at AJ'S... no dice... |
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12:30am
at the bar.. It happened just when Peter and Chynna
left in a hurry. |
Me and Julie
Found Azland hanging out in China Town |
Full |
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Egg
Plants |
Michelle
was looking kinda hot... and wallet chainy...Michain |
Ronnie
had his own kinda sideFX |
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Thursday June
16 2005 |
Just
thinking to much
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Mr
Sand Who?
I
need some quiet in the mind. I havent been
sleeping to good these last few weeks.
It is affecting my life. The days are starting
to all become one again. I am not getting
that fresh new day feeling when I wake
up from the few hours of sleep that I am
getting. The-yesterday is not paying me
a visit, I am not getting that yesterday
was yesterday feeling. Or, it is not leaving
me a rose on my pillow.
Any way I need too not ignore my self or
what I am thinking but more like
turning down the volume a few decibles
for a few hours during the day or when
I go
to
bed. I feel
if I dont any time soon , I might end up
like these two poor souls who didnt quiet
there
mindsor
get enough sleep all they dis was hung
around the bar too long. They dont even
realize
they
look
like this most of the day. At least they
are happy now.
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The
good the bad and the sleepless ... |
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It's
good to just be mellow and just except the fact that
I will never have a great rack when I play pool... |
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I
have been here before... I just dont remember what
I did to get my sudo Zen modes... oh yeah... I did
nothing. |
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Maybe
I'll just were pink and get a chain wallet like I used
too back in my goth rock days. |
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Wednesday June
15 2005 |
Whatever
happens in the city of sin stays in the city of sin
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We
can |
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Always |
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Leave
that |
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In |
VEGAS |
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BABY |
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Tuesday June
13 2005 |
About
Last Night
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Monday June
13 2005 |
Over
the weekend
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Friday & last
Thurs last Wed June
8,9,10 2005 |
A
little more wow
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Serafina
last Wed got her hack license and now she drives
a cab after graduating from NYU wih a degree
on Linguistics a month ago. She really likes
pool.
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Michelle
is getting a little Rockin Rolly these last
days. Maybe something happen in Costa Rica
when she parachuted and landed in Ronnies Moms
back yard. |
Wed & Thursday |
Michelle
is wearing a chain wallet now. |
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Ya
Gota be Cab driver to play good pool |
Serafina
last Wed got her hack license and now she drives
a cab after graduating from NYU wih a degree
in Linguistics a month ago. She really likes
pool.
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Wednesday June
8 2005 |
Wow
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Passive
aggressive is not Zen 2:30pm.
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Tuesday June
7 2005 2:00pm |
Catching
up and still stoked and smelling the roses
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Eric
and his Dad. Mr and Mr Freidwald. |
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Julie
makes out with Patrick, Patricks take David Home, Masha
is being A Masha and Eric brings his dad to the bar.
Yup all
is normal befor the storm. |
The mysterious woman, a rose
and death.
So a few days ago
After I went to practice with Julie in the pool hall we went
to the bar to shoot some more then something happened at
the bar that got on my nerve, (scroll down to Friday
/ Thursday June 2-3 2005 5:00pm.)
My emotions were like a mad bull and my thoughts
were like a bull rider trying to take control of the bull,
trying not
get bucked off and trampled.
When I left the bar I took notice of that the thing that
got on my nerve was still nudging me but not really getting
me steaming me inside. This is probably due to the fact that
I have been heavy on the books of getting a little Zen again.
I took notice of how I felt and the emotions they were stirring
in side of me instead of ignore it, then I did a little rational
about the nudging nerve thing along with some generalizing
why
the thing that got on my nerve got on my nerve.
As I ride the bull in my head-walking down the street
thinking to my self to be in the moment and not in the moments
ago a women pops out of grocery store I was about to pass
by and gives me a rose as she walks by me. She says to me “this
is for you.” I take it from her like a baton in a relay
race and say thank you with out stopping. Then after about
15 feet after we past each other I stop then turn around
and she’s already standing were she is waiting for
me to turn around and says “that is for you” and
again I say thank you. The woman was tall, thin; around in
her thirties with long blond hair, I go home.
I got home about three in the morning and get ready
for bed untill...
Just before I go to bed I put the Rose in a make due vase
in my room then I go into the kitchen to get a glass of milk.
To my surprise as I walk into the kitchen I see a dying mouse
in the middle of my kitchen floor, not dead, dying. I’m
feeling heartrending inside about the dying mouse cause I
no my brother was the one who poisoned it. I thought it would
be a little creepy to take digital pictures of the dying
mouse but I did anyway and then I put it in a little Tupperware
bowl and put out side to die. It died on the way out side
I stared at it with blinking as it took it last breath and
gota-tell-ya, watching a living being turn into a sack of
meat right before your eyes is something you will never get
from a Hollywood movie. Death in real life is more affecting
to your life then watching some actor pretending too loose
his or hers life in some ones arms in some corny scene from
a movie. I don’t care how many Oscars you got sitting
on your mantel, death cannot be imitated. I say to myself
after relearning what a lose of presence feels like no matter
how big you are; my game is going to be for the little guy.
The next morning I look at my rose and see it is a little
wilted thinking it might be because the stem is to long,
so I cut it down a little at the stem. Later that evening
the rose looked radiant and was getting ready for city match. |
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Monday June
6 2005 5:00pm |
Team
Stick it in won the The City Finals. Las Vegas here
we come !!!!!
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Team
Stick It In Won the APACity Finals
for the Vegas spot for a chance
to win $25 to $30 thousand dollars
$$$. I will have writin
details, pics and commentary later
this week about the last few days
beforeand about the weekend battles.
Right now I am a little stoked
about finaly winning the spot after
three and half years on the APA
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Saturday and Sunday is
when the battle took place ... Team Stick it
in came up on the top ... |
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The Captain Camacho |
Julie
and Peter |
Stuart and Julie |
Bill
delivered the final win !!! |
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The
Team Stick it In
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Ya
see Julie practice helps a little
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The
Team
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Ronnie
Kisses Jason Cane for a great Match
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It's
simple, if too Samurai warriors are doing
there city final battle and one has got
the drop on you and he moves in close for
the kill but cant really administer the
killing blow cause his sword is to long
for a close quarter stabbing in the chest,
so he needs a short dagger to do it (Kill
you) and he doesn’t have one, but
you have one hanging off your belt, If
he ask you can I borrow your short sword?
Are you going to loan it to him so he can
finish you off? Whatever. Sportsmanship,
go figure.
*
Round 1 Match 1
G-1 Julie plays first
I don’t know how it happened but when
I went outside just for a moment it hit a few
tokes of a cig and rush back in the bar to
see the match, I see Julie’s opponent
using my short Cue to administer the killing
blow! Why in the freaking cake hole is Julie’s
opponent using one of my weapons to destroy
her!?! Sportsmanship? Does sportsmanship mean
to help your enemy beat you? I came to this
match with the basic essentials of a intermediate
pool player, pool cue, short cue, chalk, taper,
rule book, powder, break cue, a rag and a pen.
Along with a full intention-with every pool-game-match-means
necessary to beat my opponent. I did not bring
my weapons of mass-Get-in-the-Hole-makings
for my opponent to use against me at a critical
moment of any one of the games. If I came responsibly
prepared for a match it is because I respected
the match as an important match, my opponent
should have done the same if not for himself
for at least his team. If my opponent new already
about the particulars of being in the APA 8ball
bar league then he/she or at least one of his/hers
team mates should have been aware as well.
When you get to the APA City Finals, ya-got-there
thru short cue usage at some point doing the
your team 8ball season. Julie lost a game because
some nice guy or gal loaned Julie’s enemy
one of our own weapons to kill her. It
is not sportsman like to patronize your opponents
irresponsibility or lack of respect for himself,
herself or
the team. What ever. Ron says we don’t
play that way, its ok to loan the other team
your equipment to play. That’s good karma,
I guess, he authentically does not see loaning
your short cue as an egotistical gesture, he
is just simply being nice, which was good cause
we won the round anyway.
*
M2 - Peter plays second and barbecues his opponent,
decaffeinates his opponent, WWF smack downed
his opponent. He brings us back from what looked
like a not so sexy setting of the tone.
M3 - William plays third. Here comes Bob. Bob
as in Bob-a-cue
William gets whipped like a 5-dollar mule.
I played a guy who’s been playing pool
before I was born. He broke and ran-he broke
and ran-his name was Bob. 69 years old and
played pool in the Bronx for 40 some odd years,
with my dad, as I discovered from him after
the spanking I got form good old Bob, who also
sings in a doo-wop group; he told me this a
little while later. He doo-woped my ass 4 zip.
The last time I got beat like that was about
two years ago from an old lady wearing a Guns
and Roses tee shirt, she had a hole in her
neck from smoking to much. “Lets Rock
Sonny!” She says to me using a mechanical
voice box after she took a few tokes of a cig
thru the hole in her neck. I get beat 4 zip;
afterward she was talking about making me oatmeal
cookies mixed with tobacco.
*
We are down two
M4 - Rachel beat her opponent clean. Two zip.
That guy she was playing danced around every
time he missed a shot. He was a level five.
He was being a little silly after he missed,
nervous I guess. I have seen that before. I
have even done that before, miss a ball and
follow with some silly gesture. I have seen
this before; when a team is up two matches
they some how end up putting an inappropriate
player. Rachel saves the day; we are now two
and two.
*
Ronnie plays
M5 - Ronnie says a few smart things during
the match, he eliminates every thing he thinks
that will hurt his game. As the match goes
on his opponent gets handed my short Cue from
Serafina, GgRrrRRRRrrRRRR! I lose it again.
Ronnie reminds me firmly its ok, and then I
remember his karma so I let it go. Ronnie wins
his match, and we move to round two.
The next day, Sunday. Round Two.
Match 1 we put up first
G1
- Ronnie puts me up, I lose the lag
and my opponent breaks and doesn’t sink
a ball. I step up to the table and hit every
ball
with
a firm intention of getting all the balls in
the hole. I think to my self this guy aint
no Bob, He s a little younger than me and just
an APA level 4, whatever that means. After
a few innings, I think, I sink six or seven
balls in a row and miss the eight ball, my
opponent steps up to the table, does a safety,
I miss the eight ball and give him ball in
hand, he goes for a shot. He gets one in then
another then another then he misses a shot
giving me position to get the eight, I get
the first game.
G2 - I break and almost run
the second table. I think to myself I better
perform well, Peter
is giving me the grown up eye, Ronnie believes
in me and Serafina seemingly already in a catatonic
state of fear who might play today all weighs
heavy in my head while I am shooting. I try
and illustrate a picture of being calm under
pressure so I make every shot serenely with
no jerky movements before during or after the
shots; even if I missed a ball, at least I
still looked calm but I also don’t want
to look like I don’t care ether, So I
try also give appearance of really wanting
to make the ball in the hole in a professional
manner. I sink five balls in the first inning
and I think again, my opponent aint no Bob.
My opponent misses and easy shot and it goes
that way for about 2 innings then I get ball
in hand. I am presented now with an easy three
ball run, I get one ball in the hole and make
what most pool players call “ok position” for
the next ball, so I and try to get perfect
for the eight from the second ball. I miss
the second ball but make perfect position for
the eight, my opponent is on the table and
misses and easy hole, I am not in good position
for my second to last ball but I make it anyway.
During the first two games peter is talking
to me in one ear and Ronnie is talking to me
in the other. They are both telling me different
things so I improvise. And make the eight.
G3 - I
break and play real simple, my opponent is
missing his balls too much, he’s giving
me to many chances, we go at it four about
three innings then I am on the eight. I hit
the eight carefully from a 90 degree angle
but it does not go in the hole, it sits there
frozen waiting to be taken by the guy who aint
no Bob.
G4 - My opponent breaks, he
sinks two balls, then he misses the next one,
I make
five balls, I miss ball six, he’s up,
he scratches on his fourth ball, he gives be
ball in hand and I run four balls for the win,
making one ball in the corner bouncing of the
rail making perfect position for a bank shot
simultaneously breaking loose a tied up eight
still making position for another ball with
a draw for position on the eight. During the
matches it was hard to think clearly with all
the things that happened and was happening
around me, I tried my best to keep it cool
and stay in the immediate moment and not live
in moments ago, even though is was just moments
ago it was who Bob gave me the whipping I needed
to get rid of my laziness and ego for efforts
I put in my next game.
*
Match 2
Ronnie plays a three. Ronnie wins his Match
with discipline and experience. His opponent
was good. His opponent got the first game and
Ronnie was against the ropes. Ronnie gets three
games afterward with and amazing eight ball
position.
*
Match 3
We put up. Bill. Bill been practicing. Bill
played another level 4. It was 3-3 race. Bill
makes all his balls in the hole. Bills opponent
gave Bill ball in hand in game 2, Bill was
on the eight when he got ball in hand. We win
the Cities. We got three matches with only
three game losses. The first game my opponent
gave me ball in hand on the hill and Bills
opponent gave him ball in hand when he as on
the eight ball. Ball in hand kills.
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End of round one |
Michelle |
Rachel
saved the day |
The
girls are happy they won |
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The
last two days of pics are combined I
will sort it later... Right now I am jumping
up and down with joy and relief. |
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Whew.... |
Fill what out? |
Huh? Forms? What forms?? |
Ok
now the Shock sets in ... |
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Practice
made perfect with a three match
Win with barely a game lost.
Everything
in the APA looks diffrent to
me now ... I need to call Perkash
and tell
him the team won. |
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In
the first round of day two I went up first.
During my match I found myself wanting
to preform well as apose to just trying
beat my apponent. My whole team gave me
the drive and streanth to get my stroke
back with a win from the barba-cue-ing
I got in the first round from day one from
a old timer dude named Bob whos been playing
pool since 1940 |
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Friday / Thursday
June 2-3 2005 5:00pm |
Just
doing stuff...and more stuff
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Tuesday/Wednesday May
31/ June 1 2005 |
The
last few days... |
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Stop
Big Cue ball maddness.
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When
the Cue ball from a pool table in a bar is
bigger than the object
balls, the big Cue balls contact will give
the object balls ether an exaggerated reaction
or minimal reaction. Too see what is the true
quality of your game you must play with all
balls equal, a straight cue and a fine felt,
anything other than that will be misleading
about the true quality and skills of the players
or yourself. Its game time. |
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Julie,
William and Michelle Stick it out for Stick it in
last night. |
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Julie
Mentally prepares for the big one
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Saw Jim, Played pool, and discoverd
Bulls Head Tavern.... Stinks |
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Monday May
30 2005 |
Its
like Sunday but without the laundry...
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