"Ya-know, if my self-esteem was a little bit lower, I might actually care what you think of me" ~WilliamFuentes

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December 31st 2006
Good Bye 2006

Go to January 2007










December 27th 2006

I have nothing to say...

Same shit diffrent day...

Just a little pool today.










December 24th 26th 2006 Xmass Eve and Tuesday
Were is the Snow?

Bees…the color of snowflakes.

I was in a room. Large, long, almost like a wide hallway, high ceiling, warmly lit, hard marble floor smooth but curved. On the left side of the room were large windows starting form the front all the way to the back of the room and on the right side were doors also leading from front to back. There was a lounge couch at the end of the room, there was a door behind the couch, my coat was on the couch, I want my coat so I walk towards it. My heels are clip clop on the marble floor I look down, and my feet are hoofed, like a satyr. I walk down the long room; I turn my head to look out the windows. It was cloudy outside and the room was high up above the ground. I can see the ground though on the horizon. It was all smooth stone pavement, hilly, hazy, shades of grey, I know all about shades of grey. I hear doors behind me opening and closing and people talking, I don’t turn around though. I look forward to get my coat. I reach the couch and grab my coat, I need to look behind the couch, and I have to for some reason. Behind the couch are tiny beehives. I tap one gently, foolishly and bees, white bees, albino bees horde out by the thousands covering the room like snow flakes, the buzzing sound you would naturally hear from a horde of bees sound more like a gentle wind blown through a flute. Some of the snow-bees start to land on me but do not sting me. I’m covered like a snowman now, again I say the bees do not sting me, instead they whisper to me, tiny whispers all at the same time, the snow is trying to tell me something, I am completely covered with the snow, the snow bees, its heavy, there heavy, I start to quiver, and they hold me tight, they keep on with the whisper, there words are blended with the wind-which is there wings, so many chatter to me softly, snow flake bees. I feel there frustration, cause I cannot make out what they are trying to tell me, trying to get me to do something, to many all at once to much for me to understand, they fly off me and fly away, my coat disappears out of my hand and I start searching for my coat.


My dream starts to get jumpy after that. I remember my cousin was in there I’m talking about the giant room, and my little brother as well, didn’t see ether one of them but I know they were there. I remember going outside to the grey land, I’m interacting with different kinds of people, I remember angry bees, only a few though, were chasing me, and I remember waking up, at first I thought I really woke up, I rubbed my eyes and go for the bathroom, but, there was a giant bee hovering over to my right, I guess I really didn’t wake up. This was a bee, bumble, yellow an black, giant like the size of a 20 pound turkey, kind of blurry though. I swat it with my pillow but then I wake up again, I jump out of my bed and I start to look for my coat, there it is, I look in my pockets and find…nothing, I always have something in my pockets. Now I feel there is something missing, something I dropped or lost, or maybe it was taken.


Dec 24th 2006 I remember when December in NYC had snow falls like this.

It’s the eve of Saint Nick 2006 and there is no snow.

Its annoying ya-know, no snow on Christmas Eve. Was-up with that? Hey Jack, lets getting cracking with some cold winds and electric air. Make everything look clean and new. I miss those seasons.










December 22th, 23rd Saturday. About Friday. Day Time and now night as well

See how I screw up Mafia

Thanks Jack.D...


Watch how we kill Gabby

Watch how we kill the Psycho In the Game Mafia


Adrian can cook

The food

was so Yummy

What me get mad?

Your dead Gabby

Merry Christmass at Adrian and Serafina's

Mafia, Lasagna, And Douglas loseing it... As the people play in side, Douglas had his specail version of Mafia the game on the outside.

Douglas waits in the closet

People are getting killedall over the place...










December 20th Thursday. About Tuesday and Wed Night...
This I give you?

Thursday Morning

I make a Scromelet, That is an inside out omelet
Tuesday Night I eat lots of Junk

Tis the season to get loaded fa la la la la, la-la la la. Everybody in NY is really loaded fa la la la la, la-la la la. Except for me. I was stoned cold sober on Tuesday but still felt kinda hazy, foggy of sorts-in-D’uh head an-ma-braim. I was kind of hung over from Monday night as well. I’m diabetic, so the alcohol stays in my blood long after I stop drinking. So, yes, since I have been boozing it up since last month and on Tuesday I decided to go dry for a bit, yes, I am now feeling it; that feeling of too much of the party thing. It’s ok, my senses are a bit dulled and my vision is a little impaired with that blur on the edges thingy, you know? What happens to normal eyes on a cold dry day, but I’m a-okJ I’m not really complaining. It’s funny, cause on the way home after my match, there were a whole lot of people on the streets of NY really drunk, I mean laid on the ground drunk, bumbling over drunk, sleeping on the subway car drunk. This all happened last Tuesday.

Wed Night: Abby breaks and runs on the table at the bar, then she eats all the cake and cookies and runs at Daves party....


Wed Night: I eats lots of Sweet

Yummy Cookie

Get your fucken finger out of my cake Julie...









December 19th Tuesday. About Last Monday Night

The Outsiders

The angel

Its a good thing I took some pics cause I can barley remember any of this.

I got home last night. I can’t find my cue. I woke up about 4:45am and threw up. Felt much better afterward, kind of hungry. Went to bed and then…

...try to imagine a book written by Dr Suez and Rob Zombie. That’s the kind of dream I had last night after getting loaded with Jameson and Corona. It doesn’t mix; at least not with me.


Mad World Media : madworldonline.com










December 18th Monday...About Last weekend
Move over Tom Cruise

I’m reading about this amazing dude…this dude is amazing. Like charismatic amazing. Like the only way he would go is by the hands of people who can never be as amazing like him. I’m not saying I admire him, but these are the kinds of cats that walk the earth not like the rest of us regular dudes.


Political Figure / Mystic / Drinker /

Known as the "mad monk," Grigori Rasputin was an outlandish figure in the court of Czar Nicholas II of Russia. A wandering peasant and self-styled holy man, Rasputin became a favorite of Nicholas and the Empress Alexandra in 1905 after he laid hands on their son Alexis, apparently healing the boy of hemophilia. Rasputin was soon a fixture in the royal household and a particular confidante to Alexandra. Wild-eyed and unkempt, Rasputin was strangely charismatic and his personal magnetism was legendary; at the same time his bouts of drinking, womanizing, and wild behavior created a scandal in Russian society. He was finally killed in 1916 by a cabal of aristocrats who feared Rasputin's influence had grown too great. Rasputin's death became the stuff of legend: assassins fed him poisoned cakes and wine, and when the poison failed to kill Rasputin they shot him and beat him. Still Rasputin didn't die, until finally the men bound him and tossed him into the Neva River, where he drowned.

Slipping away...

What-a-ya-slippen on you wonder? I’m slipping on ice, cold hard winter ice. Holding my whiskey flask in my right hand and my dignity on the left, all under a weekend moon in the quite of the late night. I think slipping on a sheet of ice, and then falling down, hard, is a lot better, than trying not to hit the ground from your slipping. That dance you do, to stay on your feet, looks so undignified and silly next to just simply falling down, and then just standing up again.Yes, in a heartbeat you’re on the ground with out the dance, yes, this is much better, not to fight the fated fall.

Sometimes one can get away with out falling on the cold hard ice, but at what price? Your dignity? Your self-respect? To proud to admit you walked into a mistake? A cold slippery mistake? O’ that dance; that silly-silly dance of not landing on the cold hard ice; your warm breath smokes in the cold air as your arms flail about struggling to keep standing on your feet, to proud to take the fall, or maybe just scared? So really, what did you get away with? I can’t do it.

I cannot do the dance on a sheet of cold hard ice. Not me, no racing heart or struggle to prevent the fall, I’ll just fall. Then ill laugh, then I will get back on my feet and take another shot from my whiskey flask, and look were I’m going next time, if any.









December 16th 2006 Saturday. Just a little about Friday night.... I'll put up the rest of the stuff later
New Song in the Juke Box

Poem by William Fuentes

Persist was so passive an unwavering.

Resist was so alluring an undeniably sweet.


Poem By Sri Chinmoy

Persist, You will succeed.

Resist, You will succeed.

Smile, You will succeed.

Cry, Lo, you have already succeeded:

You have perfected your love life.

You have manifested the all mightiest Reality-Dream.

This Morning I think about what I do

I look inside and think…

I will be respectful of that…

But then I push. No. Instead, I then pull.

There shirt rips at the sleeve and I end up falling, horizontal, into a brick wall made of water.

Then I wake up. No. Then I fall to sleep, sleep to wakeing dreams.

Cause that as far as it’s going to go.

Last night Dec 15th 2006 Friday.

I tried to dotty about my usual manner of toasty-ness during these holly-days of love and gift giving that I am so desperately trying to make memorable. The last few years before this one left me dry like a cheap Champaign and kiss-less under a deadly missal toe. It worked for a little while, now, it turned into a vice. The booze; the booze turned into a vice. At least it did today. So I stopped drinking after my third shot and went home to my bed.

In my bed, in my head, was this quote that was afloat over my thoughts about the evening. “Persist, resist”. This is dangerous, I think. This quote got me into-and-then out-of a corner I painted for one and myself accidentally.

“Persist, resist” The Header for her Blog; Jina Bloton.com. This is where I first read this intriguing quote about eight months ago.








December 15th 2006 about Thursday night....

Me and my Friend Mojito

Doug does the Mojito dance

My Mojito moves

The bar was a mile long

My peep likes to eat
D'uh Jazz, food and drinks were good

I was here but then was gone

I had almost had one two many

so I carried on...









December 14th 2006 ... About Last Night Wed.

Dialog 8:30pm

December 13 2006 in the bar by the pool table

William: “Hey Julie, what is the name of that guy who was yelling out Stella? Stella! In that movie, Streetcar named Desire, you know that guy, what’s his name?"

Julie: “Huh? What? What Movie? Oh wait…Huh? Oh yeah, Rocky….?"

And I was sober when she said that...

Rocky Balboa and Marlon Brando, to some people, are just old yellers...

Its a good thing I decided not to drink today

I slowed down with the devil juice today....

Talk to the hand

Shes Landed
I come in peace
Stop were you are


DJ Party Chip can spin a mean Dorrito

Strawberries made me think Rocky is Marlon Brando









December 13th 2006 ... About last night Tuesday

2:30pm Growing up and growing down and growing all around

I’m hung over today, time to slow down William… anyway.

About life…its good…my faith in people has some restoration today…yes some of us do grow up, learn and move forward. Take bold steps, bite the bullet and suck it up. Do what’s right with no ego, pride and stubbornness to change what is best. This is easer said than done, but can be done. It takes a lot of work to create simplicity, security, safety and what makes you or/and your loved ones happy.

3:15pm I’m kind of dizzy right now.

Ok...Then there is the unfortunate circumstance of kinds of upbringings. Some of us getting older and growing down with age, the inner child takes over the old body. Stubbornness, anger, frustration, taking it out on those who are not the foundation of what ails you. Trying to make enemies from ones own simple juvenile demeanor. What ever, thank the stars I know were my back pain come from. Taking painkillers don’t fix the problem. The problem is what’s causing the pain, the pain is not the problem, the slip disc is the problem. The sliped disc is causing the pain. Put the disc back in place, the pain then stops, then you don’t need the painkillers anymore. Don’t fix the disc, the pain continues and then you need the painkiller? Get addicted to the painkiller you will never address the problem. The painkiller can be called Alcohol.

5:15pm I rarely come across people who see me almost clearly, people who get me, who-right away, gets a sense of what I am and not take advantage of it. Alex-gets me, Pia-gets me, Julie sometimes gets me but when I say a joke she goes, huh? .A few other as well who get me, but they don’t like it. Don’t like what they get, at least not right away, but later regret it, that’s funny.

5:28pm Sometimes I cannot tell what kind of impression I send out. 

Pia Gets me

Alex belongs in the AVE C Gang







December 12th 2006 ... Tuesday after noon. About the last Sunday and Monday

Tuesday Lunch: Dragon Roll

Tuesday 1:35pm

Oh my stars…. I’m going back to all the drunk MySpace messaging drunk dialing this weekend, and boy, was I a bit of a drama queen, just a bit. I’m a little embarrassed about some of the things I wrote, not that much though, just a little. I feel kind of silly about some of the people I have been calculating my interaction with these last few weeks. Those who I would think would behave one way with me are not and those I would think would be the other are not as well, It’s all dazed and confused.

I’ve always said (written or whatever) I have had this issue about putting my dukes down when it comes to trusting. I put my guard down, bam, I get hit in the nose by those I would think would never, and then for sure, get punched by those I think would do in second. This might be true in some cases but lately I can’t tell if the hit is necessary and the understanding is needed or vise versa.


Tuesday: Ok now about the last Sunday and Monday

Sunday 2:00am

They are all sleeping. Something about late night whatever late is…when everyone around you is sleeping. You can feel the calm, the rest of all; the residual sounds and urgency of movement in the air are still. It’s all settled. And then you start thinking, about stuff. About how you starting to get a clearer picture about some folks and vice versa. Right now its cold outside.

Monday 1:00pm

It’s not that cold outside right now, its cold but not bleeding like it has been for the last week. I kind of loathe talking about the weather, for almost any occasion, even on an elevator ride with a neighbor you only see once a month, but it’s the fervor in the atmosphere that stirring my mood. I can see why people around me are a bit irritated and annoyed; it’s not good that it’s kind of warm for December. Inconsistent temperature is bad for your health; both physically and mentally. One can get a little peeved about inconsistent behavior with people, places and time of year.

Monday 4:00pm

 I need a drink, no… I need a drink of water. 

Monday 5:15pm

Ok, I drank a lot of water…I feel better.

Monday 7:20pm

Oh oh, I’m drinking, and its not water. It’s the Holidays I'm drinking damn it. Its ok I don’t normally stay high on booze for three or four days in a row, but right now I want to be a little ho ho ho.

Monday 12:45pm

Pete brings home the win. GET IN THE HOLE is good.

Monday/Tuesday 2:25am

Yes, I’m a little spinney, and now, I’m going to sleep with my bed spins.

Tuesday 1:35pm

Cute Sushi Lunch, Back to top of Dragon roll entry.

Dazed and Confused

Ok Now Im getting sober









December 9th 2006 Saturday MorningThen Night then Sun Morning.

If shes stays cold ...

... Then You Stay Warm

Choose your influence, don’t let influence choose you.

Saturday night: The influence of Alcohol, how influential can it be?

10.23pm. Saturday, Ketel One VODKA, already hammered. I drunk dialed Julie, she wasn’t amused, so she quickly, politely hung up on me; my peeps, my peeps.

We are who we are. We do what must be done or we let our influences choose what must be done. Must, what a funny word. I believe that there is some people out there who are just like you but at the same time we are all unique.

12:34pm Saturday. Ketel One Vodka. Still drunk with my bro.

Still drunk Dialing people. I said to Jason on the Cell "King Kong almost made me Cry" AwWww.

I drunk-dialed Sam, Jenny, Jason, Julie and Tina, only Jason ( Mr Method ) picked up, somewhere at around 12ish:am. Jason is good. Man, this is drunk, It’s not like a whiskey high, this is Vodka high? Its different, a whole different world, its more of an out of control drunk, that’s not a good thing or maybe it is? Is this what Masha discovered? I drunk dial Masha, she picked up and was real sweet with me, even after I woke her up out of a slumber cause she has to work early Sunday morning, she knows what Im feeling. I’m so hammered right now, I am drinking on an almost near empty stomach, almost, and I ate some ramen noodles.

I just drunk dialed Jay Sullivan and Wiphey.com, she was cool, she IM’d me this link of a movie that freaked me out. Jay didn’t pick up, hes still cool though, he MySpaced me. I think now I will drunken dial Nell.

I drunk dialed Jenn, Jay, Jessica and Jenny Chang. I left a call back number for JC of 212-123-4567 to disguise my call cause I really wish I didn’t call her, I new she wasnt going to pick up. I drunk dialed Julie and she’s still ignoring me; my peep Julie. I drunk dialed Summertime and then started leaving drunk dialed MySpace messages all over my MySpace friend list. I think there might be a trend here. Why William? Why the sudden blast of alcoholic behavior? Cause lately it’s been cold.

2ish:am People take comfort in there misery. Its familiar, its what we are use to, so we go to it, we live it, we handle are selves in the way we are use too. Boy, Vodka is a really strong up way to get drunk.

Taking new steps in your life is sometimes scarier than living in the miserable maybe boring maybe dead end life you have already. So you keep handling your headache and hartaches the way you have been for years even at the coast of a solution that might be a brave-might-be seemingly a foolish one.


In my Drunken Stooper last Friday Night I went and bought this Premium Black Rabbit Fur Russian Trooper Hat from a Friend. The Rabbit was not killed to make it, the rabbit was shaved then the hair was sewn on a thermal fabric. I woke up with it on Saturday Afternoon, along with me still wearing my coat on and my Makers Mark your pocket shot juice in my hand.

Adrian Still has Turkey Stock from Thanks Giving. The Game Mafia. I was the Cop.









December 8th 2006 about last Thursday night and a little bit this morning

This morning on the way.

Some person had their garden hose snap in the middle of the night, so it made like a sprinkler landing on their front gate and on the sidewalk. Needless to say, the sidewalk, (which had a slight slope downward) made like a toboggan ramp and the gate looked like something out of the North Pole, it was kind of pretty so I took a few shots of it before my battery died.


Last night:

Was another one of my evenings of numbness and dumbness. My lord and master Tom Cruise wouldn’t be to proud of me using booze and dancing Aki's as a means to drown out my internal drama, this wouldn’t be Scientology-esk-expectable, I don’t even think Chuck Norris would like it ether, aw man.


Click here for Tom Cruise Kills Oprah (.MOV file)

OH YES I DID. Im gonna need permission for this one... Ill put it when Aki gives me the OK for her momentary lose of drunken dignity.

Bad Kid Crowd-C Julie, dont eat the posion leaf food thingy, its bad!

Eating is fun.... and filling, for Bad Kid Crowd C Aki


After Mama food we went to or more to the fact, got sucked into a place of Crowd B Kids

At least the felt is new

Not to Crazy about in here... Crowd B people, go figure.

But whatever... as long as I spent $35 dollers on a round of waterd down drinks, Then it's all good but bad.


Bad kid Crowd C goes back to the club house to do bad kid Crowd C stuff... Like

Watch Rich Run for dear life

as AJ, Ronnie, Pete and Mike Laugh.

And AKI Doing her Anti Tom Cruise Dance

Meat loaf Sweet-tates, Mac and Cheese for me.

I was the only one who finished my plate...

Still eating

Mr Method kicking my ass...again









December 6th 2006. About Last Tuesday Night. And a little this morning.

Wednesday. This Morning.

I was stopped by the sight of decapitated wing on the road. Looks like an angel lost its wing or had it ripped off.

With what was going through my thoughts this morning and how was feeling, I will take it as a sign. I cannot fly or I need to accept it as a dead issue or something gothic and tragic. Ether way, I feel poignant inside about things that are kind of minor kind of old and kind of sad. I know the right thing to do is to just let it sit and marinate. I’m not waiting for anything or anyone nor do I expect anything ether. But the letting sit thing still makes me crazy. It really sucks when you find someone one or finds you and who gets you and who you get and still feels alone. All I’m doing is drinking and getting numb and living day to day until all the little things drown out and fad away.

Tuesday last night

Here is some more of my way out there rational APA things…

Imagine, playing a bunch of game winning a bunch then losing a bunch then winning a bunch then losing a bunch and so on and so on and so on. How much emotion can one apply on this kind of repetitiveness? Me? Not much, at least not anymore. Maybe a few years ago I would’ve complained, but now it looks more to me like, whatever. I played Peter for the umpteenth already during my years on the APA, more than two times already if you want to know. I like Peter, he makes low percentage shots look high percentage. Four rail shots on the eight and then gets it in the hole deserves respect, at least from me. I used to get yelled at and then criticized by Peter Chang for shooting like that even after I got it in the hole. Some people call it crazy, some people call it luck, whatever, call it what you want. I will call it respect the man for doing what he likes to do on the table and make it work for him. Stick it did well yesterday, we stuck it out with a little mercy on the other teams part. I drank to get Dumb again I ate sushi and played pool.

G Money Bunny

Brings it home for the Win


Sushi time ...


Slap it ...

Bill slapped it in the hole










December 3rd, 4th 5th 2006 Sunday. Monday Morning and then Monday Night

Adrian...Stay away from the Juice...stay away....

Something I wrote a few weeks ago...Not really about Monday but kind of sort of relavent.

Winning is a result. Meaning an outcome, a sum of an equation of an action from cause and effect. Winning is not something you practice at. You practice so you can get a win or the win, but what you are practicing does not have win or lose in it. You can still win but lose or you can still lose but win. You attain a skill with practice so you can get the results you want, results can be win or lose. Your result will measure the quality of your practices. Trying to win when your are practicing is poor practice. Winning should be the inevitable not the objective. You can attain a winning skill if your practice will result in winning, what you consider a win, when you think it counts. When does it count? Good and smart practice will result in what you make a win or a lose. If you are practicing to stay on the table, you are indeed practicing something, that’s for sure. A win should be an inevitable result. Your results come from a practice involving no expectancy of results.


Great skill does not always give you the results you want....

...But you are still with great skill.

9:am. Monday.

I really don’t like talking about the weather, but in this case I will make exception. As some of you already know …

I live in a Van down by the river. So it was cold this morning, 34 degrees. 67 degrees three days ago, 34 this morning. Hello December.


Sunday. Its only way uptown is were you would find

Makers Mark for $20-bucks a bottle. This shots for you Kong.


I liked the part when King Kong was bashing around all the seats and dumb Asses in the theater. Then I changed the Channel cause I new what was coming.

Sunday, Laundry and Lunch

Saturday Night...

Les Miserable King Kong

Nothing wacky just stood home for a safe and almost completely sober peaceful evening. King Kong was on the tube, so I watched it. But stopped watching it at the parts when they beat him up and then shipped that poor Guy (Kong) to NYC, where he committed suicide. Kong was a lonely depressed being, with all of his loved ones, family and friends long dead. He lived in a world were everything around him was deadly, and the creatures living around him wouldn’t think twice about taking his life if it meant getting something from him. Though he was born in the jungle it does not make life for him any easier. All he had was the beauty of the Vanilla and gold sunset. He was brutally kidnapped to entertain and be exploited too shallow NY-kers in a stage theater. He at some point in his capture realized, there was no way to get back home to his already Les Miserable life, or he was just fed up with life already. Yeah I might consider jumping off a building as well if I was living like the King; Kong that is. That movie almost made me cry the first time I saw it, as campy as it was.








December 2nd 2006 ...Saturday. About last Friday night...

I can barely remember

any of this shit...

And I know it had to do with Ms Jameson

I drank, I almost blacked out…almost, I was safe though, I was with peeps, and it was fun.

Crash for the shot

Anyway I did a quick stalking of that feisty one. I wanted to say happy birthday ... so Happy Birthday

So I gave her a little monkey and went on my way.

I noticed the less days I drink the quicker I get drunk when I do drink. It’s all good. Even though I cant remember most of the night.








December 2nd 2006 ...Saturday. About Last Wed & Thursday nights...

After some amazing Sushi I saw some amazing work


...There was a few other art workes there as well that I liked.

Yeah.. I got a little bit there with the booze.. Just a little...











November 29th about Last Monday and Tuesday


Anja Loves her Cell

Monday Team Get In the Hole

Tuesday Team Stick It In

Mad gangtsa-moves
D'uh Gankyest-gangta. John Smith

Mad Thug Moves
Yumi Gangsta

My Scarf. My best freind.
Joolie's Bootie and Aki





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